A MagiQal Life

Perrin has learned the word NO and he knows what it means on many levels. I got to thinking how he learned the word and I think it bothers me.

I’m amazed that NO is not the first word that most children learn, as it’s likely the word they hear more often then any other.

As a babysitter I tell him NO more then I tell him YES, as when he can do something I say ‘you can do that’ and there is simply no yes about it. When he does something he should not be doing, he gets a stern NO.

As his Papaw I tell him NO more then I tell him YES as I simply do not have enough money to spoil him like he deserves (also see reasoning as a babysitter).

As a secondary babysitting tool the TV encourages NO more then it does anything positive. Even when something positive comes up, its rarely a YES that is given. In nearly every show (Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, DoodleBops, Dora, etc, etc.) when they come across a problem, it’s almost always multiple choice.

Is thing1 what we need to solve problemA? NO!
Is thing2 what we need to solve problemA? NO!
Is thing3 what we need to solve problemA? You betcha!

So really it’s no wonder that NO is one of the little guys favorite three words EVER, as he hears it time and time again, all day long.

I think I am going to try training myself to find alternatives to NO (nope, nada, not this time). Maybe even start up with words like MAYBE. I also plan on trying to work on YES a little more. Possibly by setting him up in scenarios that will require a more positive answer. Like giving multiple choices and picking the right one first.

I’m not really sure, but I do know that NO is an issue (with more then just my little munchkin). I mean, how can we build a positive future with so much negative reinforcement?

Share This

This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 19th, 2007 at 9:44 am and is filed under family. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.